Colleen's Birth Story - Gabrielle's POV

Tonight I got to be in the room when one of my best friends gave birth. I want to write down everything now, while it’s still fresh in my mind.

Tanya texted me early this afternoon to tell me I was on call, and that she was headed to the Midwife Clinic. At the time I was hanging out with my old friend Angel, who is in town this week showing off her new baby. So it was really a day of babies. I kept in contact with Tanya all day. She actually went back home for a while because she wasn’t dilated enough, so I headed to work at 4:30 like usual. When I talked to her on my first break she was in the middle of contractions and headed back to the Clinic. I had a feeling I’d be leaving work early (thank goodness for flextime!). I told her to keep me updated and let me know when I should leave. I called again right before my lunch break and spoke with her sister, Tara, who told me Tanya was in the tub and hard labor was going to happen at some point and she’d call me when I needed to come.

Tanya texted me a little after 9:30 and told me Colleen wasn’t going to make it ‘til 1:00 (which is when I was scheduled to get off work). I told her I’d leave work at 10:00, and I did. I asked her if she wanted me to bring her anything, and she requested popsicles. Of course all of the grocery stores in the vicinity close really early, so there was nothing open. I felt bad to get there empty handed - I actually knocked on the window of Food Lion in Pooler and looked really tragic but they weren’t impressed. They were closed. So I drove to the Clinic. Sped a bit ;).

I had to call for directions on how to turn into the building - you have to drive in by the KFC, go around another building, and you’ll find yourself there. Tara was nice enough to let me in. Tanya was up walking around, trying to encourage Colleen to come out more quickly. Tanya’s mom was there, along with Tara’s 2 twin baby boys, Tanya’s dad, and her husband, Mark. The men were hiding in a room in the back, somewhat overwhelmed. Tanya was in good spirits even though she was having really painful contractions like 5 minutes apart. I ate some deer jerky & grapes (snacks were provided, haha) and walked around with Tanya. The building is in a square shape with a hallway going all the way around, so we were sashaying because she had to get her hips moving. We were sort of dancing and Tara was taking an endless amount of pictures.

Tanya was really starting to suffer and went to lay down for a while. I rubbed the small of her back with some warming lubricant while her mom rubbed her back. She was kneeling on the bed by now to try to move the baby in a better position. Then after a bathroom break and plenty more contractions, she got into the jacuzzi tub, where she planned to give birth. (Sidenote: midwife clinics are so the way to go - why does anyone go to a hospital unless they have to?!) The midwife thought she looked really uncomfortable the way she was sitting, which she did, and said someone should get in the tub with her and support her. I volunteered, stripped down to my bra and underwear, and dove in, if you will. Keep in mind Tanya is totally naked at this point, and her husband Mark is in the room, along with her mom, her sister, and one or both of her sister’s babies. It is absolutely mind-boggling how pregnancy makes being naked totally okay.

So I got in the tub and Tanya sat in front of me, her back to my stomach. And I held her hand and supported her arms while she pushed. There were fluids floating around (the midwife fished them out with a little fishing net, I swear to god) and Tanya was so miserable. I felt so awful for her. She was just in so much pain, she was delirious. She kept snapping at poor Mark who was really trying his best. She just couldn’t let go & couldn’t relax & let the baby come so she kind of took it out on him (but I don’t think he took it too personally). She squeezed my fingers pretty hard and my arms kind of went numb for a while but I wasn’t moving for anything. The midwife checked the baby’s heart rate very regularly (until the nurse came and then she took over) and was concerned when it was slowing a little. She had Tanya sit up some which helped a little but the decision was finally made to move her to the bed.

After we both got out of the tub, I changed into some dry underwear, threw on a robe, and came back into the room. Tanya was on the bed with her mom on one side and Mark on the other, with Tara and I as observers and occasional procurers of water and cold cloths. Tanya was straight up in some misery. She had been crying in the tub and wanting the baby to come out, but the midwife super calmly told her Colleen was taking her time and this was her first baby so she was blazing the trail. I may have made a really lame Oregon Trail reference here. This midwife, by the way, was so reassuring. She has been running this clinic for literally 23 years, and she was calm and chill and you could tell she’d help women giver birth literally hundreds of times. My cousin is a midwife in Germany and she came and did an internship with her like 10 years ago and the midwife remembered her, it was neat :).

So now comes the for real pushing part. She had been doing some pushing in the tub, but due to positioning it just wasn’t working for her. So when she’s on the bed she’s now pushing with every contraction and yelling & moaning a little bit (but not as much as I expected - I would have been cursing a blue streak). I’d been texting Scott & Ramsey all night with updates and of course when I was in the tub I was not texting, so when I finally checked my phone I’d gotten 3 super impatient texts from Scott demanding updates ;). I told him “sorry in labor!” and then sent him updates in between each contraction. They were coming almost constantly at this point.

Watching the head try to peek its way out has got to be one of the most exciting things I’ve ever witnessed. Like, Tanya had been walking around for 9 months getting bigger & bigger, and I went to her shower, and I felt Colleen’s limbs from the outside, but now she was seriously busting loose! I kept thinking it was like she was busting out of jail ;). Tanya was pushing like crazy with every contraction (you have to push like you’re taking a shit, seriously, and don’t scream out of your lungs because it wastes the energy you could be using to PUSH). She had to take lots of rests in between because omg so much work! I’d gotten there at 10:30 and by this time it was after 1:00 in the morning. Mark had made a personal bet that she’d be out by then but that was not the case.

Finally, right towards the end, I was able to see more and more of her head. And then all of a sudden she gave this huuuuuge push and BAM there was a BABY. Like, where there hadn’t been one before! Just all messy and attached and kinda whimpering and at this point the floodgates opened and I just started sobbing like crazy. I just stood there and cried. It was absolutely one of the most emotional moments of my life. It’s absolutely indescribable. Tanya just looked so overwhelmed and there was a BABY and Colleen cried a little bit and they dried her off and cleared out her lungs and her nose and suddenly everyone was taking pictures. All I could do was send out a text message saying, “she’s here! it’s amazing” and cry some more. I probably cried off and on for a good 10 minutes, and I’m not really a crier like that, unless it’s a movie or a book.

I really desperately wanted Ramsey to be there holding me, but he obviously couldn’t be there (although he did send me some really sweet texts) so I grabbed Mark and gave him a huge hug. We were both pretty emotional. He told me later that even though I was a “flaming bleeding heart liberal” (Mark and I bicker constantly about politics, he’s a gun-toting Fox News aficionado) that if anyone tried to hurt me, he’d come after them. It was incredibly sweet and I was touched. We’d actually been “discussing” politics much earlier in the night; when Tanya heard us from the bathroom she told her sister to tell us to stop talking politics. It was pretty funny.

So back to Colleen. Some newborns (many newborns) are not especially cute. They’re kind of weird and alien-like. Not this baby. She is absolutely gorgeous. I don’t even think it’s because I’m biased. I genuinely think she’s a really cute baby. When I finally got up close and got to see her snuggled up against Tanya, I just couldn’t stop smiling and of course I started crying a little bit again. Mark snapped some pictures while I’m all emotional in my robe; I’m sure those’ll be pretty great.

Colleen was born right around 1:54 and I think she shit on her mom like 10 minutes later, no exaggeration. Oh and did I mention the placenta?! I’ve always been kind of weirdly fascinated by it, and it just looks so gross and awesome all at the same time, I feel like a 13 year old boy when I see it. Mark cut the cord, which I photographed, then we all stood around for a while as the nurse and the midwife did some medical type stuff. Colleen figured out breast-feeding and Tanya took it like a trooper, she said it didn’t really hurt, but after labor what the hell is some pinching on your nipples anyway?

I changed back into my clothes and hung out a little bit longer, chatting with Tanya and feeding her some crackers. I ate a slice of Domino’s meat lover’s pizza before I left. I finally walked out the door around 3:00 in the morning, and I truly feel like I walked out a changed woman. I know lots of women all over the world give birth every day, but it really is a miracle. It’s absolutely astounding, really.

To read more of Colleen's Birth Story read My POV

Colleen's Birth Story

What started out as playing hookie from work to relax at home before my little girl arrived turned into 18 hours of labor and a 7 pound 14 ounce 20 inch long baby girl.

November 8th 2010

This morning I did not want to get out of bed and go to work, so I did what any 9 month pregnant woman would do on her due date; I called work and told them I was too tired to come to work today and officially began my maternity leave. Around nine I got out of bed and moved to the couch in the living room and turned on the TV. Nothing interesting was on so I looked through the DVR and found one of my favorite movies to watch, Pretty Woman. I barely made it 15 minutes into the movie before the contractions became noticeably consistent (they started earlier but I was use to the fake ones at this point). I turned on the computer and opened the contraction counter website I found a few weeks before and began timing them. By the time the horse race scene came on my contractions were 5 minutes apart and were lasting about 30-45 seconds each.

I called mom just to let her know I was pretty sure I was in labor and she, being the woman she is, began to panic. I was thankful she wasn’t at my house at this moment otherwise she would have killed us going to the Birth Center. Tara was in town running some errands for mama so I got dressed while I waited for her to arrive to take me to get checked out.
We got to the Birth Center a little past eleven and I was put on the monitors which confirmed I was indeed having contractions. Nancy, the midwife, came in to check how dilated I was, 2.5 centimeters. Not enough to officially say I was in active labor yet so we were given instructions to go get some food and walk around for a little while then come back in about an hour and get rechecked. So we did and everywhere we went Tara had to tell everyone I was in labor so we didn’t get much walking done due to having to talk to EVERYONE.

Mark met up with us at the mall, he couldn’t stand being away, and I rode with him back to the Birth Center. I was rechecked and it was determined that I had not progressed any more. Nancy sent us home with new instructions. When my contractions became a lot more painful and I was a lot less happy it was time to come back. She said sometimes it takes several trips sometimes to get it right. We left disappointed knowing we had to go back home and wait it out. Mark went home to change for work (he had court that night) while me and Tara headed to mama’s house so I wouldn't be alone.

I spent most of the next few hours lying on mama’s couch hugging a pillow trying to stay strong as the contractions worsened. I attempted to eat some pizza but was not very interested in it. I kept looking at my watch, waiting for Mark to get out of court before I went back to the Birth Center, because I knew this baby was coming tonight. At this point I was getting scared, what if me waiting for Mark was going to make me too late to get to the Birth Center? Was I going to deliver this baby in the car or at mama’s house??? I kept debating with myself whether or not to call Mark out of court. At 6:30 the contractions had gotten so close together I called Nancy back and we got ready to leave. It would take Nancy almost an hour to get to the Birth Center since she had already made it home for the night. Court finished early and Mark made it to the house in enough time to drive me back to the birth center. The car ride was HORRIBLE!!! The whole crew, Me, Mark, Mama, Tara, and the twins, made it to the Birth Center right at 8:00 and I was now 6.5 centimeters dilated – I was not going home without a baby in my arms. I let Gabrielle know we were here to stay (she was at work) and we told daddy who left his poker game and the mass texts began going out and Facebook was updated. In a few short hours I would be a mommy.

We settled in the room and got comfortable (well everyone else did…there was no me getting comfortable at this point). The tub was filled and I got in which eased some of the pressure of the contractions. Every once in a while I would be rechecked to see how much I had progressed. When I jumped 2 centimeters in an hour I got word to Gabrielle that this baby was not going to wait for her, she was going to have to leave work early if she was going to make the birth.

Nancy had me get out of the tub and start walking around to get the baby into a good position. As I walked around the Birth Center Gabrielle arrived and immediately went into “helper mode.” We sashayed in the halls, stopping only to allow the contractions to run their course. By 11:30 I was fully dilated and ready to push when my body gave me the ques. Nancy called in her nurse and they broke my water to ensure the liquids were clear (otherwise I wouldn’t be able to deliver in the tub) and given the ok to get back in the tub. I thought the contractions were bad before – they escalated after my water was broken.

At one point the baby’s heart beat began to slow and I had to move positions to give her room, which was an awkward position so Nancy suggested someone get into the tub with me. Gabrielle didn’t give her time to finish her sentence before she stripped down to her undergarments and was in the tub with me. It wasn’t long before I knew what the “ring of fire” was and I knew when it was time to push. After pushing and pushing Nancy had me get out of the tub because the baby was not in the right position and had me do some tricks to work her into a good position. I was ready for pain killers at this point but I remembered in one of the classes I took that by the time you think you need medications you are almost done so I opted out of asking for any.

Most of this time was a blur to me; it consisted of changing positions and pushing, moving and pushing. I remember mother telling me she could see the head and I was almost done and I wanted to hit her cause she had to have said the same thing over and over again for an hour. I had Mark on one side holding a leg and mother on the other. I remember yelling at her between contractions because she would let my leg relax and I didn’t want it to be relaxed…I wanted it sturdy. I remember thinking “She is never going to come out” I began to panic because I didn’t know what they were going to have to do to get this baby out and it was then I pushed as hard as I could and she was here. I remember asking “is she here?” several times before I got an answer.

She was here in my arms – my precious baby girl! Born on November 9, 2010 at 1:54 a.m.

For more of Colleen's Birth Story read Gabrielle's POV.

Week 20 - Bananas and Daddys

Week 20 – my baby’s legs finally get to be counted in the length so now it’s the length of a BANANA! I love bananas – banana pudding, blueberry banana smoothies, banana bread, frozen bananas dipped in chocolate, banana split, banana chocolate milkshakes! OH I’m hungry again! My baby is also slippery like a banana peel too – the little booger is moving around like crazy in there – I try to feel it on one side and it just slips to the other side! Late last night it was kicking real good that it finally made my tummy jump. A couple kicks really poked out and it felt so funny – it tickled! I couldn’t help but giggle as it wiggled and kicked. Child Mark has been trying to feel it kick for a week now and he finally got to feel it tonight but it wasn’t that strong and he tried to explain what it felt like – it was cute.

This past week I got my first adjustment at the chiropractor – felt really good to be “snapped crackled and popped” as Mark likes to say – the chiropractor however does not explain it that way. Apparently my upper back is straight where it should have a curve to it, but I’m very easy to work on.

I’ve discovered that either my hips are spreading or my butt is just growing, so I sent Mark into town to the maternity store to get me a new pack of panties – such a good boy to go get me things like that. I told him too while he was there to get me a new bra the next size up since mine is not fitting as good as it should, however, the store suggested I come in to get measured instead of him just buying the size I say. While he was there he also took the liberty to buy me a pair of grey pants – he said I needed more than one pair of pants. It was a nice surprise.

Father’s day was this past Sunday and Mark was excited to get not just one, but three Bill O’Reilly books – one for each of his children…Mark, Puppy (ok so pretend kids count too), and Baby Rich. He really appreciated it – especially knowing how much I really despise buying political books to feed his already Right sided brain. I hate getting into politics – but as long as he doesn’t make me read them or read them to me I’ll smile and say “Glad you like it”. I really do have a great husband who just so happens to be a wonderful father who will do anything and everything for his kids, born, unborn, or the ones that simply call him Da Da cause they don’t know he’s not daddy.

One week left until my next ultrasound! Can’t wait! My little girl is just waiting to be announced officially LOL!

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I've come back and added in week 21 since I never posted it on here before.

Week 21 - Its A GIRL!!!

The much awaited ultrasound has arrived and my little girl was verified a little after 9 on the morning of June 29th. My grandmother (who had arrived from California to see Sister’s babies) was able to come to the appointment along with Sister, both boys, Mama, little Mark and my Honey. The morning started out hectic – me panicking because we woke up late, then the child had a hard time with his shoes, then we arrived before Mama and crew but it all worked out and we did not miss the appointment. When the tech called my name we moved back to the small room and boy was it packed. The ultrasound started and I saw my baby once again. I was so nervous to find out the sex because I really wanted my little girl…sure enough there was no little pecker between her legs! Had everyone not been there I probably would have cried but I kept very cool, surprising myself. According to baby center my little girl should be about the size of a carrot and it was pretty close. She weighed right at 13 ounces and is perfectly healthy. Everything is developing perfectly – I couldn’t ask for anything more (well I did – for it to be a girl…but now I’m done asking – she just needs to continue growing like she is and be born healthy).

After the appointment Me, Mark, Nana, and the kid drove into town to Babies-R-Us to register for all the adorable baby girl stuff. I tried not to go too crazy with the pink but I don’t know if I did such a good job with that. I tried to think of things I needed instead of so much of what I wanted. I did splurge picking out the crib and dresser – they are really expensive and even though I’m pretty sure nobody will buy something that expensive a girl can still dream.

Once we left Babies-R-Us we headed to the mall to hit up Target and do another registry there – by the end of that we were all pretty tired so we headed home.

We can also officially release the name of our daughter (which we’ve had picked out since before I even knew I was pregnant), Colleen Elizabeth (Named after both mine and Mark’s mother). I will try very hard to call her Colleen since there is no real easy way to shorten it without calling her Collie (like the dog) but if we did shorten it to Collie it would go right along with Puppy!

Week 19 - Pants and Classes

Wow – week 19 already! This week Baby Rich is about the size of the large tomato I ate Friday in the Wal-Mart parking lot – although it did nothing for the starving feeling I had – it did at least get at least one serving of veggies in my diet for that day. This week is the week I should be really feeling the baby move around but I am lucky enough to have already felt the baby move for about two weeks now.

This past week has been a very informative week. I had my first pregnancy class at the birth center, which its overall lesson was on health and nutrition. The main things I need to focus on is eating healthy, have a positive attitude, exercise, and relax…I figured I was working on these already, however I am not as on target as I thought I was. I know I was not the best eater in the world, but when I was looking at the serving sizes of the different food groups I was shocked to find out how much of a not healthy eater I was. I am a rules follower and since I had a guideline to go by for my eating habits I figured I would use it and get all my servings in each day…better said than done…I began panicking cause I could not eat enough to get everything in and had to hide the sheet before I stressed myself out too much since after all, I’m suppose to be reducing stress too…

Along with a guideline for nutrition I received a guideline of lifestyle choices, which pregnant or not is very insightful. I think if I can even do half of what is on the list I will be less stressed than I normally am.
1. Start each day with a positive thought
2. Do something you enjoy each day
3. Learn to focus and center
4. Set realistic goals
5. Work on good relationships
6. Establish routines
7. Simplify your life
8. Get enough sleep
9. Pray
10. Look for humor in situations
11. Have contact with nature
12. Listen to relaxing music
13. Watch less TV
14. Box your worries
15. Take one-minute vacations
16. Do “mini-checkups”
17. Choose to be happy

So eating and thinking right isn’t all I have to do – I’m suppose to actually exercise – yuck – but if it helps my baby I guess I’ll exercise more regularly. A big part of this is maintaining good posture – something I’ve never been able to do – so a recommendation was to get in to see a chiropractor of which I already have a call in to do.

After the class we got to hear the baby’s heartbeat which was in the 150s again – That’s my girl! Two weeks until we find out for sure – I cant wait! Until then I’m going to enjoy getting bigger in my new pants that my honey bought me for my anniversary. I love practical gifts! Especially when I cant wear all the other pants cause they hurt me – these ones are the good kind that go over your entire belly! These should really drive in the fact that I’m pregnant just a little bit more.

Week 18 - tomatoes and deer

Week 18 – only three more weeks to confirm the sex of Baby Rich! My baby bump is A LOT more noticeable now, especially if I wear form fitting shirts, this could be because my baby is now the size of a bell pepper…that’s a big change from a blueberry in my book. My baby is moving a lot more now which I can feel more and more each day.

According to Baby Center I should be laying on my side when I sleep, or at least not fully on my back, which kinda sucks cause sometimes it feels really good when I lay on my back. I’ve seemed to have regressed back into being sleepy all the time. I thought the second trimester was suppose to be the best one…again I blame Hollywood for making pregnancy seem so much fun. They sure do leave out a lot of important information, like these ligament pains that sometimes send me to my knees, or the thirty thousand trips to the bathroom, or even better the uncomfortableness after you eat that makes me wish I would not have eaten anything to begin with. This could explain why I’m still the same weight as I was two weeks ago. I have been eating some snacks throughout the day, so hopefully this will help with the weight gain a little bit.

Apparently my husband has fallen a bit behind on protecting our garden. He let some deer come and eat almost our entire tomato harvest and didn’t get me deer jerky!!! I’m very upset with that one…I’ve been really wanting some deer jerky and even though its not deer season, technically killing the deer should qualify as protecting our property so we shouldn’t get in trouble if we did kill one RIGHT??? We did manage to pick about 4 tomatoes that the pesky deer (who should be in my dehydrator right now) didn’t eat, now to wait on the other veggies to grow. Until then, I still have a nice stash of fresh veggies that the neighbor brought over to tie me over.

I have my first class at the birth center on Thursday, it’s suppose to teach me about nutrition, which apparently I need some lessons on. I will also get to hear my baby’s heartbeat again and find out what I did to myself to make my side hurt. Kinda feels like something has beat the crap out of my ovary on the right side…maybe something is sitting on it…I don’t know. Should have more to report next week…stay in tune for Week 19!

Week 17 - Cars and Cousins

Ok, so we are back to things that I’m not sure what they are – week 17 = figs; not something that I would ever pick out of a line up of fruits and veggies. This week my baby is working on making hard bones instead of cartilage and she’s developing sweat glands too…all of which is fun but I’m more excited about feeling her move around a little in there. I was able to feel a little thump thump in there and a little swishing feeling – kind of like a rocking boat. Hopefully soon I will feel it more often and stronger.

I still haven’t gained much weight and I guess I will find out on the 10th if its ok not to have gained much weight. I was already under the “do not gain under this line” line and hadn’t gained any weight since my last appointment last week. I had about 3 days last week of which I couldn’t keep much down again but that has seemed to have passed again for now as has the headaches.

This past week has been an exciting one…

On Wednesday, May 26th Baby Rich became a cousin to my sister’s twin boys. Robert (baby A) was 7.2 pounds 20.5 inches; Randall “Randy” (baby B) was 6.8 pounds 17.5 inches both are doing great and were able to go home on Friday.

On Saturday morning I felt Baby Rich move around for the first time. At first I felt the swishing around then about 15 or so baby thumps – I was really excited. Mark got a kick out of it too even though he wouldn’t have been able to feel it.

Saturday afternoon a truck backed into my car at an intersection and was nice enough to leave a nice big hole in my front bumper from the trailer hitch. I swear my car is bad luck – hence the plan to get a new, bigger, car later this year…My car was not built for baby seats and other kids – there is just not that much room in the back seat. It is a safe car though and that is my primary concern when I get another one.

The one unpleasant surprise this past week, had to change my ultrasound appointment since the tech was not going to be there on the day I was scheduled to have it so I had to move it back a week. I tried to have it a week early but the midwife preferred waiting – which I guess is ok, they are more worried about potential problems than knowing if it’s a boy or a girl.

Week 16 - Headaches and Doctors

At 16 weeks my little lemon has ripened into an avocado, about 4.5 inches from head to butt. My sickness is almost fully gone however last week was plagued by headaches and according to the midwife at my appointment today it could have been caused by SEVERAL things; stress, increased blood flow, caffeine withdrawals, dips in my blood sugar from not eating often enough among other things. In other words I need to start eating every two hours, quit drinking coke as soon as possible and relax for a little each day. I wonder if eating a skittle or two every half hour will keep my sugar consistent…might be fun trying.

At my doctor’s appointment today I met one of the other midwifes at the office, she was nice and informative. I’m healthy, my test results were fine and my uterus is now about two fingers below my belly button – it was kind of uncomfortable trying to find it. Heard my baby’s heartbeat again today, was beating at 150 beats per minute. Mark heard it from the waiting room where he was keeping the kids entertained. Apparently I have to get the movie Jungle Book and let Mark watch it since he could not properly pronounce Mogli’s name when he read the book to the kids of which I got a good giggle out of.

I’m only up 3 pounds from my pre-pregnancy weight and I’m really trying to eat good and more to get my weight up (that sounds so weird to say). One place I read said if you are not gaining enough weight then to drink a milkshake each day, good source of calcium and extra calories…I need to go to the store and get me some chocolate ice cream and bananas, make me my banana chocolate milkshakes!!! I’m excited! Another exciting thing…two of our neighbors have brought over fresh veggies and fruit. Baby Rich REALLY appreciated the healthy stuff – she did share with the rest of the family too!

Speaking of SHE’s or HE’s, we have the date for my ultrasound to find out the sex; June 22nd. I can’t wait! Last night I had another weird dream in which I went in for a regular check-up and the doctor held up my baby by the back of the neck and inspected the genitals. The doctor said it was going to be a girl and there was no way it would change to a boy. This is a change from the dreams I was having about my little girl changing into a boy minutes after it was born. Four more weeks and we will know for sure.

Week 15 - World of the apple

So here we are at week 15, the week of the apple. My baby can move all of its joints and can see light too although its eyes are still sealed shut. At this point I am far enough along to tell what the sex is however I won’t have another ultrasound until 20 weeks – so only 5 more weeks until my baby girl is confirmed.

This past week has been a lot better than the last few, I’m still able to eat and have put on 2 pounds past my pre-pregnancy weight (which it’s better for me to think that way instead of putting on 6 pounds in one week). I really did miss food. I still have a few water hang-ups like I cant drink out of certain containers or different brands of water but I’m getting over it. I still have a headache or two a week. Yesterday’s was bad enough that I had to go to bed a little past 9. Although I am allowed to take certain medications I still don’t want to unless I have to. I’ve been health this week (I think), we will find out on Monday at my next doctor’s appointment.

I have not been so good at my exercising, but I made up for it yesterday, walking up and down River Street for 5 hours. I still have my gym membership that I need to actually start using – even if it is only walking on the treadmill for half an hour.

Our last baseball game was Saturday, which I am sad and thankful for – sad cause it will be a whole year before we get to play again but thankful because it was getting HOT out there. I know why there are no summer sports – too damn hot! Thinking we’ll try soccer in the fall – I love soccer, just have to convince Mark it’s not a sissy sport – he’s more baseball/football guy cause that’s what he played as a kid. I wonder how he will do when our little girl goes to dance class…

Second Trimester and Lemons

I’ve been waiting for 13 weeks to get to this point…my second trimester!!! I’m so excited to finally be at this point – hopefully no more getting rid of my meals before I can digest it, the ability to drink water (never tasted so good) and actually able to EAT!!! I’ve been starving to death these past few weeks, losing a total of 5.5 pounds. I’ve managed to gain back 1.5 pounds of that so far and I’m sure by the morning I will have gained more back due to the dinner I was just able to eat including steak, potatoes, onions, cucumbers, tomatoes, corn on the cob, blackberries and asparagus – and I cleaned my plate. Along with my appetite returning so has my libido…

Ok at week 14 my baby can now squint and pee, probably both at the same time. My baby is now the size of a lemon and is kicking and punching more and more each day although they are still not noticeable by me yet. Apparently my baby can now suck its thumb too.

I enjoyed my first Mother’s Day on Sunday. Spent the morning relaxing then headed to Wal-Mart and bought my mommy a “Grandkids” frame for when all the grandbabies are born and can get a picture taken together. I got four cards, including the GIANT card Mark got me – he said he wanted to get a card he knew I could see LOL – I definitely saw it. We hung out at mama’s house for the rest of the evening and watched Avatar – really good movie.

Mama picked me up an infant baby carrier/car seat thingy so now all I need to get is a Grayco stroller (so the seat can snap right onto it), a crib, a dresser, and I think that will take care of the big items. Good thing is that most of the other infant stuff I’ll get from Sister since by the time my baby is born the twins will be out of the infant stage. In the mean time I can see my grocery bill increasing due to the food I’m sure I’ll be hording down.

Week 13 - Shrimp and Water

My little lime has grown to 3 inches long, which is apparently the size of a medium shrimp - I’m guessing that’s the size of the shrimps perfect for low country boil…low country boil - that sound REALLY good right now. People kept telling me once I hit the 13 week point I’d start to feel better - which seems to be relatively true. Starting on Friday I felt much better and didn’t get sick all weekend although I had another killer headache on Sunday.

Since I found out I was pregnant I’ve lost a total of 5 pounds, so you can imagine my excitement when I was able to eat this weekend. I was even more excited that I could drink water! Frankly, I’m getting tired of coke - it just doesn’t seem to do much for me except give me liquids that I can keep down. I’m really looking forward to putting those 5 pounds back on (when has a woman ever said that?)

Along with being able to eat this weekend I was almost productive. I managed to make room for the changing table I bought last week at a yard sale in my room. I had to move out the TV from my room that never got used in order to make room and the room actually looks bigger. Of course after I got things moved around my lower stomach felt like someone had punched me a few times too many so I had to quit and rest - leaving the bedroom in somewhat of a mess.

We had to run to Wal-Mart this weekend too to pick up a few things and get the boy some different shoes and while we were there I walked around the baby section and found the most adorable things. Mark wanted to go ahead and buy baby diapers and wipes to start stalking up for when it gets here but I didn’t want to jinx myself buying anything this early. I already took enough of a chance buying the changing table but for $15 I couldn’t pass it up. Maybe next week I’ll start buying diapers since I will officially be in my second trimester! Officially only 7 more weeks until I can find out what my baby is going to be even though my gut already knows - I’m just hoping I don’t have to admit that I was wrong, but if I am it will be ok - I’ll be happy with whatever is given to me. This baby will be the most loved child ever!

Week 12 - Limes and Choo-Choo Trains

Another week down, we are at week 12 now and we have made it back to a size I know…A lime! Lime’s may not be my favorite fruit but apparently they are really good in Corona’s – not that I would know due to the fact that I detest beer but nonetheless it works. My baby apparently will squirm when my stomach is prodded, which we found out first hand during today’s doctors appointment. While we were trying to find the little lime to hear its heartbeat, almost as soon as we found it the little stinker would move, causing a very loud swooshing sound. We did get to hear the heartbeat – sounded just like a little choo-choo train.

Today’s doctor’s appointment included my physical – which all the women know exactly what goes on with one of those – some points are not very fun at all. Since last week’s appointment I’ve lost 2 pounds. Normally I’d be happy, especially since this is the lightest I’ve been in the last 5 years but these past few weeks have not been so fun. I’d much rather have gained the weight. I feel horrible, not just cause I’m sick all the time, but I feel guilty that I cant drink water, which I know my baby needs, and I cant eat anything healthy (or even unhealthy) – I was wrong that all babies love McDonald’s French fries…mine just doesn’t care.

Mark was able to attend my appointment with me – he was a very good record keeper. I have a binder which has all my information that I need to know at this point, including a record page so I can keep up with my weight, blood pressure, baby’s heartbeat (today it was around 140) along with other things and Mark was steadily filling in the blanks making sure he got it all recorded. He even was tasked with his own homework, although it was more along the lines of “make sure she does ____” and I’m sure he will take his job very seriously.

With my pregnancy all my energy has gone to keeping my baby safe and healthy, which I don’t mind at all, but it has left my body susceptible too all sorts of infections. At 6 weeks pregnant I had strep throat, at 8 weeks a yeast infection, and 12 weeks a bacterial infection and with each new thing the meds cost more and more. The first prescription was only $4 but today’s…$70!!! That was not exciting to see.

We ended the day playing poker, trying to win back the money we just spent on the medicine but about 2 hours into the game I found myself getting more and more aggravated with the other players who kept taking my money, so I went “all in” to have myself taken “all out” which allowed me to chill out. I did manage to keep down my Chicken Bacon Ranch sandwich from Domino’s that I ate for dinner – even if I did only eat half of it before I fed the rest to Mark. Hopefully this will continue for a few days to help restore some much needed energy, but if it don’t I’ll at least know my baby is doing just fine and it will all be worth it in the end.

Week 11 - Figs and Doctors

Week 11 has come and my kumquat is gone, only to be replaced with the most adorable fig ever! My baby has its arms and legs and will soon be making fists to punch me with. This week has helped ease the “all day” nauseous but has replaced it with a whole lot of puking. Just yesterday alone I couldn’t keep down my breakfast or dinner – dinner ended up in the flower bed which my honey was nice enough to wash away for me.

This morning was my first doctor’s appointment at the Midwife Center, which was fun. Mark finally got to see the place and he was very impressed, he said the place was very “homey” which I agree. I am very happy with my decision to choose to have my baby here, even though my initial decision was based on the no insurance and it was more affordable to have the baby, but now I would have had the baby here even if I had the best insurance offered.

Today was more of a group meeting where me and about 7 other moms-to-be were introduced to the functions of the center and were rotated into different sections to have blood work done and our ultrasounds. I was last to have my ultrasound and at first the baby was sleeping – which scared me – I didn’t see it moving and my heart dropped. When I asked the tech if she could poke it with the wand thingie she just said that if I held my breath that she would wake up. Boy did she wake up…she started kicking and punching and moving her arms and twisting around. It was AMAZING! I managed not to cry but thinking about it again its hard not to cry in relief – my baby is perfectly fine! I’m gonna be a mommy! Oh – did I mention there is only one baby LOL – no multiples for me. (Pictures are posted on my facebook).

I have my next appointment on Monday, which will be more of a one-on-one appointment and my physical (which I really need – my last paps was back in 2005 if I’m not mistaken). Until then I hope that my sickness will get less frequent and I can go through a day and not fear that I will not make it to the bathroom or that someone will hear me puking in the bathroom at work. Will update next week – I wonder what size my baby will be then???

Week 10 - What's a Kumquat???

Well, it’s been 10 weeks and now my baby is the size of a kumquat – what the hell is a kumquat??? I guess my baby will still be referred to as a grape this week, or maybe I’ll regress back to a blueberry – that one was cute.

This past week was a rough one – most of which I wont get into. My emotions are still on high alert – I get my feelings hurt QUICKLY and I’m still getting sick all the time. I was a wreck all day Saturday getting ready for Terror’s baby shower. Bought her the cutest little outfit that said how great the boys Auntie was and when I wrote in sisters card it took me about an hour cause I didn’t want to cry when she read it – didn’t work too well.

Being at sister’s shower got me thinking about what we are going to do about mine in September. Since I can count on one hand who I would invite I figured it would be more fun to have a co-ed shower and have it be more of a BBQ or something, that way Mark’s friends could come too.

We are on the last leg of tax season – but it will still be very busy at the office until the end of the month. I feel bad that I am unable to work later than I have been due to the little grape sending these “feed me” warnings right at 5 and on the weekends all it wants to do is sleep and lay around to recoup from the prior week.

With the end of tax season brings my doctors appointment! Next Tuesday I will get to see my little baby for the first time – which I hope there is only ONE! It’s so funny going into this and be excited there is only one – most people don’t give a thought of there being more than one – we will find out soon.

Week 9 - Grapes

At 9 weeks my little kidney bean has grown up into a grape, which is good - I like grapes better. My sickness seems to be tapering off a little at a time and I haven’t felt really crappy in about a week. This past few days I’ve focused on financial planning for when my baby gets here. If I play my cards right I will be out of credit card debt by February at the latest and my car will be paid off by next May which will open up a lot of extra money each month (which I’m sure will be spent on diapers, clothes, and child care in some form). I’ve also confronted my ex about getting his stuff taken care of which effects me and at first he was like “whatever” but his tone changed real quick when he realized I was serious about putting his little behind in jail for contempt of court. I’m going to keep on him to have everything cleared up by the end of the year as well. I’ve accepted that my credit sucks because of what has happened and at the moment I don’t need it, however, I don’t know how much longer Mark’s truck is going to last and I’m sure we will need to get a new car at some point in the next year or two.

This past Sunday was Easter and we had everyone over to our house for dinner, turned out great. On the subject of eggs and chickens the child Mark asked if my baby was going to hatch out of an egg. Technically the baby WAS an egg at one point, he seemed to like that answer. He has been really helpful when I don’t feel well, he will get me water and offer to give me some of his Easter candy when he eats some. Its quite cute.

Emotionally I still want to cry all the time. I think of any random though and I just about bust into tears. I don’t think my temper has gotten the best out of me lately, I would like to say I’ve been pretty calm - Mark might say differently sometimes, but at least I’m trying.

Two more weeks until my doctors appointment - Sister and Mark are going with me - I cant wait! I will be 11 weeks at that point and my baby will be the most adorable gummy bear EVER!

Week 8 - Kidney Beans

At week 8 and my little blueberry has grown into a kidney bean with arms, legs and webbed fingers and toes. I’d like to say that I have adapted a little to the nausea but I’d be lying. I have figured out that I need to take cooler showers to keep me from passing out although that little tidbit almost came a little too late. Had my husband not thrown open the shower curtain and held me up the other day in the shower I would probably have a huge knot on my head from falling. MY HERO!

Speaking of my hero, he has been so great with everything. Due to a shooting incident last week he currently has a couple weeks off work so he has been helping me keep the house somewhat clean and fetches me food whenever I need it. He holds me when I need it and holds his breath when he has his nasty shit in his mouth so I don’t get sick being around him – If I can only get him to quit that nasty habit we’ll be in business.

I can tell my hormones are screwed a little loose – I find myself crying over the stupidest things like not getting my Chicken & Broccoli Chinese food for lunch. The other night I cried for about 15 minutes in Mark’s arms because I hadn’t had sex in about a week and a half and I didn’t care – who cries because they don’t care??? My imagination is going crazy too – Mark is caring for some dogs while the owner is away for a funeral and all I could think about when he went to get the keys to the house that the woman could have been so distraught that he “comforted” her – don’t get me wrong, I trust my husband and this woman very well (partly because Mark showed me how to shoot the guns in the house) but mostly because they’ve had their chance long ago and yet – here I am now. I’m still having crazy dreams – my favorite was at my baby shower someone gave me keys to my brand new SUV – Oh how I hope this one comes true!

In other news the child Mark had his first baseball game on Saturday in which he just about killed his father when he hit the ball right at him – luckily Mark has good reflexes and was on the ground in no time and the ball flew right by him. Although we are out of T-ball the 6 & 7 year olds are still adorable when they are trying to find the ball and running to the bases trying to get the other team out. Sad part was that my camera battery died so I missed catching a lot of the funnies, I got it charged up now so I can get it all at the next game.

Week 7 - How many to go???

Well, today marks the 7 week point in my baby’s unborn life…I read that my baby is about the size of a blueberry now - its still so hard for me to grasp the fact that I am knocked up and its steadily growing. The only reminder I have is the constant nausea and now the puking that started this morning. In one of my “I don’t feel good” pouts to Mark he just laughed and said I was NOT allowed to say it was his fault cause every month I would whine at him during my “girl week” and blame him that I was going through it since he failed to knock me up that month. I’m trying my best to “suck it up” and deal with the crappiness I’m feeling because I know my baby will be worth it.

When I get home I find at least one thing that I want to change or get before the baby gets here. I figured I have at least one more year before I’m gonna get new carpets cause I refuse to allow my baby to craw around on the ones I have. I had Mark put a lock on the gun closet this weekend - partly because puppy can now open doors and he thought it was funny to get in that closet and hide - NOT a good idea. Then I started thinking about where I was going to put all the baby’s things since I figured I’d have her in my room for at least the first 6 months or so - that one I haven’t figured out yet. The one big thing that keeps plaguing my mind is child care - I really don’t want to put my baby in day care, I hate the thought of some stranger raising my kid for me and I miss out on first words and steps. Hopefully daddy’s job works out really well and mama will be able to baby sit. I have to constantly remind myself not to stress out too much on things like that cause I have at least 10 months to figure it all out.

I’ve been dreaming about my baby (although in my dreams there are SEVERAL babies) almost every night…The last dream I had triplets and as they were delivered they were announced as all girls but when I held them I noticed the first two were definitely NOT girls and before I could look at the third I woke up. I don’t know if that is suppose to be some sort of sign to not get my hopes up on a girl or if me not seeing the third one means that my gut feeling that I am having a girl is true…I don’t know, I need to quit analyzing every little thing or I will drive myself nuts.

I will try to relax and let this change happen and whatever sickness happens to me is fine - just stay away from my baby!

I'm PREGNANT!

My life is about to change again… Yesterday after our first baseball practice I came home and took a pregnancy test and turned it upside down on the bathroom counter so I wouldn't be tempted to sit there and watch the results and went to cook dinner. I wanted to wait until Mark got home before I read it, however after I got dinner started I just couldn’t wait any longer. I have become an expert at taking these and have always been disappointed at the results so I figured this time it I would get the same result, that it wouldn’t matter that Mark wasn’t there to look at it with me…but this time it was different…this time it was positive! There I was, standing in the bathroom looking at the stick in my hands looking back and forth at the indicator strip and the box making sure that the plus line was actually there and it meant positive, for all I knew they could have changed the test. I grabbed the phone to text Mark and let him know that he needed to hurry home but I called sister instead and told her the results.

I felt like I owed it to sister to tell her first since I’ve been so bitter about her being pregnant and I wasn’t, especially since I wanted one and was ready for one. I got better with the thought that this was happening to her until I found out she was having twins. I fought with myself that I should be happy for her, and I was, but it was a hard pill to swallow and I felt guilty as hell for feeling that way. I just knew I was going to have to settle for being an aunt to my twin nephews that are to be born in June, and a step-mom to Mark Jr., and that I had to suck up the fact that I wasn’t having any kids of my own any time soon. But after months and months of heartache I finally have the results I’ve been longing for.

Mark finally made it home while I was on the phone with Sister and I had to hang up real quick so he didn’t get any ideas on what was going on. I went back into the kitchen to check dinner and waited for him to go into the bathroom and see the test sitting there, but as usual he was being stubborn. I had to walk out into the living room and ask him for a hug and while I was in his arms I asked him if he was mad at me for not waiting for the morning to take the test like we planned on doing and I started to cry. Of course he wasn’t mad at me but didn’t know why I was crying, it hadn’t donned on him what I was trying to say until I said “its positive”. To say he was excited would be an understatement. All he could do was hug me and laugh, then he had to run off and find the test so he could see it for himself, then pretty much call everyone in his phone.

There are still so many feelings running through me right now that it makes me dizzy at times…

Eagerness - I have to wait HOW LONG - gees…November is a long time away…

Disbelief - its hard to believe this is finally going to happen…

Regret - for making my sister feel bad about her getting pregnant before me - had I known for sure that I could have kids I would have been able to be a better sister for her when she needed me…

Fear - what if I don’t do something right? I hadn’t even given a thought to my drops until mother mentioned it to me…

Nervousness - Is what I am feeling normal or is something going wrong already?

But what I feel most of all is…

Happiness - my hopes and dreams are finally coming true…